Voices in the Clouds

This speaks to my heart... I hope it does yours... :)

Huge thanks to Ben, who wrote it :) 

My Latest Newsletter!

I wanted to repost my newsletter in my blog for those of you who are not on my mailing or emailing list. :) I hope you enjoy! 

The Farm 

Hello Dear Family and Friends,

It has been almost a year since I came to Canada and started my Discipleship Training School (DTS), but it feels like a lifetime ago that I was living in Minnesota, a lifetime ago that I was driving down Highway 94, or meeting with friends at Caribou. Over the last few months I have been learning how to live life post-DTS, and it has been challenging to transition into the rea lworld and what God wants for me now. It has also been some of the best growing months thatI have ever had, more and more I feel that God is working in my life, stretching me, causing me to grow, and healing me. He makes all things bright and beautiful, and it is in the face of death to self that I have begun to taste life in full. And I am even learning how to love farm life…  

Maureen, Callum and I

This past month has been one of God reminding me of how far I have come. Of how far He has taken me. And of how much I have to give to those around me. One of my greatest blessings in serving in Canada is spending time with the many guests of Greenhaven Charity, spending time with the local youths, and working with women who live at the local shelter. More often than not, I feel as though I have nothing to give to the street-wise guests or the hardened youth, but then, I am reminded that God does have something to give. And, He has chosen to use me as an instrument for His purposes. I am learning more and more that this life and what I do is not about me; it is about what God does and who He is that is important. I feel so fortunate that I can watch Him work through me and see the fruits of leaning on my Heavenly Father. 

Mini DTS Reunion :)

In addition to working with the people in my area, I have also had the opportunity to serve in more practical ways, such as cleaning and gardening. Often, these small tasks remind me of how God works in all of our lives clearing away the grit and grime, or weeds, and giving us a fresh start. Sometimes, this process needs to be repeated, but He so patiently goes back to the start if that is what we need.

Working hard, making Cookies!

In the last month or so, we have started a new YWAM iniative to reach out to the local Christian youth.  We  hope to later do ministry amongst local non-Christian youth as well. We are seeing God’s formation of a young team of individuals who we would like to first train and get to know, then allow them to decide how best to reach their peers. As they tell their stories, I realize that none of us are immune to pain and hurt, and in many ways, my heart breaks for the truths that they share because they are so young. At the same time, I feel honored that they would speak so freely with me and with my teammates. I only hope that I can give them just a piece of what the Lord has given me, hope and knowledge that God can heal all our wounds. 

Pray for us, for the youth, and for our work! 

In staffing with YWAM I.Net, I do continue to need financial and prayer support, which is why I am so grateful for all of you. Please also know that I am praying for each one of you, and I hope that you all have received my letters. And feel free to write, facebook, or email me back. I love hearing from you! I am thankful that I know each and every one of you. Thank you for reading my newsletter and for encouraging me so much over the last few months. I could not do any of this without you!

         

Day at the Beach

Thank you!!
Natalie 

Please also feel free to email me if you want my address or anything :)           

September update :)

So, these last few weeks have been rather exciting time. Lately, my small band of fellow YWAMers and I have felt God moving in a direction that all of us sensed at the beginning of our time together at Greenhaven, but nothing ever happened. We talked about doing stuff with the youth. Possibilities of youth churches, groups, clubs, and even a drop in center were bandied about, but nothing happened. They were ideas that fell quickly to the floor as we dealt with other issues that were much more urgent.

Once again, we have felt a return to the youth idea... well, sort of. We’re actually not sure what it is, and what the youth will do, mostly because we believe that the youth should decide that for themselves… we are simply facilitators. It is so much fun, though, to see them become excited about God, to see them ready to jump in and do His will.

On a more personal note, I have noticed that this time of working with the youth has often brought up in each one of my team members the areas that we need to work on. I think for myself it has often resulted in me comparing myself to my team members and not feeling “spiritual enough.” Whatever that is supposed to be in my own mind’s eye, I don’t know. However, I have begun to realize that we all hear God’s prompting in our lives in different ways. Some have a deep inner sense, others can feel a noticeable difference in the room, some say it is a still small voice…. In fact those I have talked to about hearing God and letting Him work through us have never given me a definite picture of how He works… the reality is God’s leading is as diverse as His followers, and I think I forget that sometimes, and I become hard on myself when I do.  I lose sight of the fact that I need to discover the way that He best talks to me and works through me, whether that be through an inner discernment or feeling that something just isn’t right (or 100% right on), or if it is more of a sensing in the room based on what people themselves are saying. I am beginning to see that I need to trust Him more in order to “trust my gut” as I often pray for because the more I know Him the more I will come to a place of knowing that He is guiding me and showing me when someone is being real or if what is being said is wrong.

Please pray for my team members and I as well as the youth that we are spending time with. Thank you!  

Letting Go

Over the last month, God has been asking some tough questions.

Am I willing to let Him have it all? Am I willing to stop holding back?

I have been feeling God ask me to let go of everything. Let go of my control over my life (what little there really is). To let go of my life. My future. My past. My dreams. My hopes. And my fears. Letting go of what I want, of people, and of the expectation that I will get any type of reward whether in this world or the next for anything that I am doing.

I have been learning that this life of mine isn't actually mine.

The other day a friend told me that she has the next six years of her life planned. Two years ago, that would have been me, with a plan, and sticking to it. Now, I don't even know where I'll be living in two months, much less what I'll be doing in eight months.

It's hard. It's tough. I really like making plans. I like knowing what to expect. I like that consistency, that stability. I like feeling like I have some control over my life. And I like believing that I don't have to give anything up for a life dedicated to Jesus.

I am learning, though, that I have to give that up as well. My comfort isn't God's concern, and it shouldn't be mine. I am finding that I let so many things stop me from being all that God made me. From being the person that He created me to be.

And for what? For what others think about me. For the fear of the unknown and judgement from others. The reality is, only two people's opinion of me matters, that is God and me.

I have tasted the freedom of Christ.

So I have to let go.

And let God have it all.

This past week, I volunteered for a Christian camp for young men and women. Some were local, and others were not, but it was a great week. We had lots of sugar, stayed up late, and spent a good deal of time talking about God.

The one thing that I kept wondering before going to camp was how to best share Christ with these young people, most of whom have heard talk of Jesus since birth, but as we all know, talking about God everyday from infancy doesn’t make us Christian or even Christ-like. Don’t get me wrong, it is good to talk of Jesus and who He is, but it doesn’t always result in a heart change or even a tangible God experience. Once saved, always saved doesn’t work for me. 

However, I was reminded of my own journey and I was able to share it with the young women in my cabin, other staff members, and those I was with. And I find that in this sharing of my life, I was able to remember and glorify God. It is Christ and His redeeming grace that I am sharing when I tell my story. I didn’t hide who I am or what I’ve done, and I hope they felt free to be themselves as well and feel the release that comes from being honest with themselves and others. But, it is in these moments of transparency that I felt God the most during the last week.

I can’t tell you how many times the people around me admitted something and all I did was shrug my shoulders telling them that God works on each of us in His own way; that I wasn’t here to tell them if they were right or wrong. I wasn’t there to tell them to change their lives. I was there to encourage, tell them whether or not they were on the right track and question them if and when necessary, but judgment wasn’t in my job description. That’s God’s, mostly because He sees hearts, and He alone is blameless.

After finishing my week at youth camp, I was exhausted. Sadly, I am not fifteen anymore, and the late nights do take a toll. But I can’t help but appreciate those in these kids lives who encourage them on a daily and weekly basis. The teachers, mentors, youth counselors, and pastors that are able to come into their lives and speak to youth on their level. These people spiritually parent our kids, and fill the voids that exist as a result of absent parents, I have the feeling that many teachers, youth pastors, mentors, and youth counselors have felt something along these lines. Young people today do not need our judgment or disapproval because that isn’t fair. They need our love. 

Mobile Caribbean DTS 2013!!

Our upcoming Discipleship Training School (DTS) is officially set for January 2013; it will be a Mobile Caribbean DTS, which means we will be traveling to five countries in the Carib in five months! It is the perfect opportunity to escape winter, and enjoy sunshine! Feel free to spread the word, let your friends, family, and neighbors know. And check out our website to learn more: http://www.ywami.net/dts_caribbean.asp

Our big project at Ywam I.Net is this new DTS. And it is a lot of work getting a DTS up off the ground, not only do we have to get students (so please feel free to spread the word), but we also have to get staff members, speakers, and locations pinned down. I don’t think I ever realized how much work goes into the 6 months of discipleship that I went through last year.

None of this has hit home more than this last week, which I spent in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, at a DTS Staff Training. We spent 4 days talking non-stop about DTS, and I think I realized that staffing a DTS is a huge responsibility, but the full weight of the responsibility didn’t hit me until last week. Staff members of a DTS are taking on a role to disciple men and women from many nations to send them out to make a difference wherever God may lead them. I guess it is the same responsibility teachers, mentors, and pastors have, but after having completed my own DTS, I know how intense it is. In some ways, I don’t know if I can truly convey how powerful the process is because there is nothing like it. It is 6 months of you concentrating on God and God concentrating on you… and sometimes, that hurts. But, to be a staff member, we have to facilitate this. God is entrusting us with His people. That is a huge responsibility; thankfully, what happens is totally dependent on God and not on me J

YWAMers from around Canada at DTS Staff Training

Huge thanks to those who led the training this week! Also, thank you to my awesome staff members who led my DTS, you rock! Don’t ever change!

Revolutionaries... of Love?

12.3 million people around the world are trapped in forced labour (ILO). 


24,000 children died today due to poverty. 


72 million children of primary school age were not in school in 2005 (globalissues.org).

What does this mean?

To you. To me.

I live in relative comfort. I have a bed, a roof over my head, and food to eat. I have received an education that has allowed me to learn to read, write, and think.

And I'm assuming that most of you can relate. Most of my family and friends live in first world nations, and receive the benefits of living there. We complain about health care, taxes, and the fact that our politicians seem to never get anything done, but really, we have so much. 

Have you ever watched a family member die of a curable disease? Have you ever thought about selling your child to put food on the table? Or worse to give them a better future? If you have, I'm sorry, but to most, these thoughts seem abhorrent. The reality is, the need to survive often causes us to ask questions that bridge on insanity, immorality, and desperation.

Poverty causes hopelessness. Poverty creates crisis among the most vulnerable.

What does this mean?

Poverty in a first world nation means soup kitchens and shelters... but consider a place where none of those exist.  No one cares that people on the street are starving. No one sees the swollen bellies of young children as a miserable plight. No one cares that your child will suffer from a lack of education. No. One. Cares.

Consider a world far from your own. Consider the places you have never seen. Dare to see the world through the eyes of the hurting.

Shane Claiborne, author and ordinary radical, believes that the most dangerous place to live is in suburbia. And I'm beginning to believe him. He says, "We must neither get used to the darkness of human suffering or fall asleep in the comfort of the light" (The Irresistible Revolution). There is a balance.

As I am currently living in a very comfortable situation, I have found it is easy to forget that there are people suffering in this world. The men and women I encountered in Japan and Thailand, easily forgotten. Out of sight, out of mind.

Is this really how God wants us to live? Forgetting the most vulnerable in the midst of our lives? Dismissing those who could use our help? This is not an accusation, rather a question to consider, myself included. We get caught up in our lives... that must break God's heart. I don't believe that Jesus ever promised His disciples ease, comfort, or safety. Instead, Jesus said, this world will hate you because of me.

Does the world hate us? If not, are we doing our job?

Okay, I know what you're thinking, the world does NOT like Christians. True, the world may strongly dislike Christians, but is it really because of Jesus? Or is it because we are a poor representation of Him? Do they really dislike someone who came to love generously and pour compassion on every hurting person He came across? Or do they dislike the Christians they bump into along the way?

To be perfectly honest, people telling me, "Jesus loves you," doesn't do much for me. Don't get me wrong, I firmly believe that Jesus loves everyone, and that God created everyone equally, but telling someone that Jesus loves them doesn't mean anything when it isn't shown. Jesus rarely ever told anyone He came across that He loved them. He showed them His love. He never told them He would save them, He showed them the Father. He showed them how to love one another.

Jesus revolutionized this world through His love. And in a way, I think that is what He wants us to do too. I believe that God wants us to reflect and demonstrate His love for the world that He created. The people that He created. If that means I show love to people in a third world country, awesome. If that means that I show love to my next door neighbor, or roommate, that is awesome too.

The problem lies in the fact that loving people isn't safe, so most of us shy away from showing love to the people who might reject us. That is natural, because showing love isn't easy. Opening ourselves up to loving people often requires us to become vulnerable... and I hate vulnerability. It's scary, it leaves me open to getting hurt. However, if you think about it, isn't that what God did when He chose to love us? He opened Himself up to getting hurt, to being rejected. And let's face it, being rejected stinks, even if you are an all-powerful, supernatural being.

So what do we do? Do we take the risk of getting hurt and love people? Or do we act like none of this ever happened and go on with our lives? I can tell you which one is easier, but I can also tell you which one will transform your life.

Daily, I struggle with knowing how to love people the way that God loves them, seeing them through His eyes rather than mine. I screw up regularly, but I've been on the other side. I've seen others love me because Christ loved me first; they loved me when I didn't deserve it. They showed me Christ's love. So, maybe being a revolutionary of God's love isn't such a bad idea... you might just open the door to God changing their life and He will change yours in the process.